Winning Ways: How to Confront

Silence isn't always golden; sometimes it's yellow.

If your silence is too often more the yellow, cowardly variety, then take a look at Matthew 18:15-17. Jesus gave us instructions on how to confront someone who has offended us. As we continue our Sunday morning series called "Getting Along," we'll look closely at Christ's instructions this week.

When someone lets you down, follow Christ's four stages of confrontation.

Talk in private. Jesus said, “Go privately and point out the fault.” This is where a lot of us fail right away. We talk about the person, but we don’t talk to the person. We involve a lot of other people in the problem long before we get into it with the person who has frustrated us.

Involve others. If we have to take it to the next level, Jesus expects us to know how to count. Now's not the time to rally a bunch of people to your cause. How many people did he say to involve in verse 16? “Take one or two others with you and go back again.”

Tell the church: If private conversation doesn’t solve it and if mediators can’t help, in verse 17 Jesus said, “take your case to the church.” This is a much more formal level: It’s now a case that has to be solved, not just an issue to be settled. For months and through multiple meetings you’ve tried to get this solved one-on-one and then with mediators and the person who’s hurt you still refuses to deal with it. So you and your mediators bring it to the church.

Cut him off. If a private conversation doesn't resolve things, if a small group of mediators couldn't get anywhere, if a formal church intervention didn't move the heart of the offender, what other choice do you have?

Sadly, we often go first to the step that Christ said should be last. Let's get this right. Join us at 10 a.m. this Sunday for a deeper study of this important topic.

And, by the way, join us at 10 a.m. in the gym! Many thanks to everyone who stayed after church last week to clear out the auditorium. In just 3 hours the whole place was stripped bare! Renovations have begun, so our summer worship services will take place in the gym. I'll be in short-sleeves, so you feel free to join me. See you Sunday!

 

Links to Your World, Tuesday May 29

More than a third of divorce filings last year included the word "Facebook."

 

Simon Critchley at the NYT blog, Opinionator, has a 3-part series on the Gnostic-infused ramblings of Philip K. Dick toward the end of his life. Dick was the author of several books on which popular films have been based, including Blade Runner and The Adjustment Bureau. Though what fans now call his "Exegesis" is fascinating, it's deeply sad. I'm not sure I see anything more in "Exegesis" but the fevered writings of an unraveling mind stitching together random philosophical musings to make sense of what is clearly a psychotic break. Part One is here.

 

Though I'm no fan of the President's ideology, this is a beautiful story about the iconic photo of a black child touching Obama's head to confirm he's "just like me."

 

The Internet that connects the world is dependent upon undersea fiber-optic cables. Here's an excerpt from a book on the surprisingly-fascinating topic of laying and managing this backbone of the modern world.

 

"My dad texted me after watching [the season finale of Glee]. 'Ryan Murphy’s vision of utopia makes me sad. He is quite the evangelist,' he wrote. I agree. [Glee creator] Murphy is an evangelist. Sometimes he’s right, and sometimes he’s wrong, but as we’ve seen this season, he is always ready with a Tuesday night song and sermon, simplistic and cliched though they may be. Let’s just be sure our Sunday morning song and sermon (not to mention our lives) are offering a truer, more compassionate, more complex, and more beautiful story: the story that we were born this way, but we can all be changed into something glorious" (Read Amy Lepine Peterson's post here).

 

 

 

 

"Tempting as it is to dismiss the malleability of sexual orientation, resist the urge"

William Saletan of Slate is a must-read columnist for me. He's center-left, which means we would not agree on a number of topics if we were sitting together at a coffee shop. But I could see us actually sitting at a coffee shop. In a recent column, "Fifty Shades of Gay," Saletan cautions his fellow pro-gay advocates against insisting on what kind of thinking must be right for everyone with same-sex attractions:

Homosexuality is fundamentally personal, not political. Like heterosexuality, it varies from person to person, and it can evolve over a lifetime. Experience and research suggest it’s extremely unlikely that you can change your sexual orientation, and you’re better off accepting who you are. But what’s true for you may not be true for someone closer to the margins of homosexuality. Tempting as it is to...dismiss the malleability of sexual orientation, resist that urge. Morally and therapeutically, it’s better to treat people as individuals....An unusual subset of highly motivated people can find ways to alter their sexual self-understanding and possibly their behavior. Those people have no grounds to say conversion therapy will work for the rest of us. And we have no grounds to say it can’t work for them.

He's written about this before. It seems a perfectly tolerant position, though stated more center-left than I would state it. In fact, other than the "accepting who you are" sentiment, his view is compatible with the Christian message.

The "accepting who you are" sentiment won't do: I don't want to "accept" those parts of me that are incompatible with Christ's expectation of me. But aside from that, Saletan's on to something with his defense of those "highly motivated people" who have found ways to "alter their sexual self-understanding and possibly their behavior."

That's a good description of discipleship for Christians who have same-sex attractions. The call of Christ to those with such an orientation is not to first expunge the attraction and only then surrender to Christ's saving Lordship. Rather, the call of Christ to those experiencing same-sex attraction is like the call He extends to every other believer: We receive his mercy and then accept the task of conforming our mind and actions to his values. We are indeed--all Christians--"highly motivated to alter our self-understanding and behavior," to use Saletan's words, in whatever ways our self-understanding or behavior is out of line with Christ's expectations.

Such a process isn't easy or overnight, but neither is it dangerous or unreasonable.

 

"It's a good time to be living for God"

It’s a mercy to live in a troubled time like ours, when the world is falling apart and secularism is discredited and we have no clever answers for our needs. We’re less likely to be taken in. It’s more believable now that our only salvation is in God. The collapse of the city of man is the opportunity of the city of God. It’s a good time to be living for God.

Raymund C. Ortlund (in Isaiah: God Saves Sinners)

Winning Ways: It's Move-Out Time!

"To labor is to pray."


That was the motto of the Benedictine monks, and it's going to be our motto this Sunday as we pray and labor.

Come to worship dressed for a little dust because we've got work to do after the morning program. After the 10 a.m. worship service and your 11 a.m. small-group meeting, we've got an auditorium to clear out. We'll serve a quick lunch for those who plan to work, and then Herb Ingram will divide us into crews and give us instructions.

Even if you can't join a work crew in the afternoon, let me tell you why you need to join us for worship in the morning.

First, Gene and Brent and the gang have something special planned for the music.

Second, this is your last chance to get a little nostalgic as we say good-bye to an auditorium design our church has known for 40 years. For the next 3 months we'll worship in the gym, and when we return to the auditorium in September we'll celebrate in an updated facility.

Third, this will be your first Sunday to see images of the updated facility. Members of the Project Committee will be standing by a display to answer your questions.

Fourth, a crew from a church in Kentucky will make the drive out to get our pews, and they will be worshiping with us on Sunday before joining us on the big move-out project. Come meet them!

This is all part of our "Beautiful Thing" campaign that we launched a year ago. Do you remember why the campaign has that name? There's a Bible story of a woman who anointed Jesus with a container of expensive perfume. The apostles said, “Why this waste?” but Jesus said, “No, she has done A BEAUTIFUL THING to me” (Mark 14:1-9).

This campaign is our chance to do A BEAUTIFUL THING for Jesus. Our Worship Center is the place we gather to praise God’s Name and to study God’s Word, and the attention we give to it says a lot about how important those activities are to us.

We're able to start the renovations two years ahead of schedule because of two things: your generous support and an estate gift that we're going to borrow from ourselves. I'll tell you more about that in the worship service this week. See you @ 10!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Links to Your World, Tuesday May 22

“Boys and girls act differently, on the playground and at home. If you choose to ignore that, you’re doing some weird social experiment and not being fair to your kids.” Joel Stein, about his new book, Man Made. Looks like an entertaining book from a father trying to figure out how to be a good masculine role model for his newborn son.

 

Why your cell phone is making you a bad parent.

 

Fleet of Ambulances On Hand for 41-Year-Olds' Touch Football Game

 

More therapists are confronting rather than coddling whiners. Here's how to get a grip on your own whining.

 

Want to live longer? Drink coffee.

 

A Dandy Lion.

 

A top-10 list of the most popular names for baby boys and girls shows a preference for biblical names. Christianity Today asks if it matters what we name our children.

 

Wow. You really should read the short piece by Warren Kozak, "Food Stamps and the $41 Cake." Things have to change in the welfare programs--for the good of the individual receiving it as well as for the nation.

 

"There are rewards for politicians, corporations, think tanks, and activists who dissemble about risk. There are none for reinsurers. If they’re taking on less of it than their insurers would like them to, then the world is more dangerous than we’re willing to admit" (Brendan Greely for Businessweek)




 

A Dandy Lion

"They cannot conquer forever!"

There, far away, beyond sad Gondor now overwhelmed in shade, the Sun was sinking, finding at last the hem of the great slow-rolling pall of cloud, and falling in an ominous fire towards the yet unsullied Sea. The brief glow fell upon a huge sitting figure, still and solemn as the great stone kings of Argonath. The years had mocked it, and violent hands had maimed it. Its head was gone, and in its place was set in mockery a rough-hewn stone, rudely painted by savage hands in the likeness of a grinning face with one large red eye in the midst of its forehead. Upon its knees and mighty chair, and all about the pedestal, were idle scrawls mixed with the foul symbols that the maggot folk of Mordor used.

Suddenly, caught by the level beams, Frodo saw the old king's head: it was lying rolled away by the roadside. 'Look, Sam!' He cried, startled into speech. 'Look! The King has got a crown again!'

The eyes were hollow and the carven beard was broken, but about the high stern forehead there was a coronel of silver and gold. A trailing plant with flowers like small white stars had bound itself across the brows as if in reverence for the fallen king, and in the crevices of his stony hair yellow stonecrop gleamed.

'They cannot conquer forever!' said Frodo. And then suddenly the brief glimpse was gone. The Sun dipped and vanished, and as if at the shuttering of a lamp, black night fell.

The Two Towers, The Lord of the Rings

"A 12-year-old's conception of religion"

There are people who, for one reason or another, have a bad experience with religion. They drop out at the age of 12—this seems to be characteristic of most of religion's major critics. And then they spend the rest of their lives attacking a 12-year-old's conception of religion.

Marilynne Robinson, in an interview with The Atlantic.

 

"Each of us walks there once"

"

People Who Live

People who live by the sea
understand eternity.
They copy the curves of the waves,
their hearts beat with the tides,
& the saltiness of their blood
corresponds with the sea.
They know that the house of flesh
is only a sandcastle
built on the shore,
that skin breaks
under the waves
like sand under the soles
of the first walker on the beach
when the tide recedes.
Each of us walks there once,
watching the bubbles
rise up through the sand
like ascending souls,
tracing the line of the foam,
drawing our index fingers
along the horizon
pointing home.

Erica Jong

Winning Ways: Hearing Aids

Communication isn't just jaw flopping. It's a skill that we need to develop for the good of our relationships.

Imagine you’re driving down the road and pass a sign with this warning: “Don’t Go Into the Box Unless the Wayout is Clear.”  Would you know what it meant? The sign would make perfect sense to an English driver. In Britain those signs are posted to warn: “Don’t Block the Intersection.”

Or say you stopped for directions and an Englishman replied: “Take the dual carriageway to the first roundabout, keeping a sharp eye for the left-coming signs. Take the wayout just beyond the first flyover after you pass the car park next to the petrol station. Beware of the loose chippings and the crown strollers. Follow the road diversion and make sure you by-pass the road-up. If your motor car breaks down, you can use the lay-by or any of the verges to look under your bonnet.”

You would probably leave that conversation mumbling something to your wife about why you never stop for directions! Again, though, the conversation makes perfect sense in Great Britain. A dual carriageway is a divided highway; a roundabout is a traffic circle; a wayout is an exit; a flyover is an overpass; a car park is a parking lot; a petrol station is a gas station; loose chippings are fallen rocks and crown strollers are slow-moving road hogs; a road diversion is a detour and road-up is a road under repair; a lay-by is a place to pull off the road, verges are road shoulders and a bonnet is the hood of your car.

Got it?

Sometimes we think we’re communicating just because words are being spoken. Real communication involves more. This Sunday morning we’ll continue our series called "Getting Along" by looking at the keys to good communication. See you @ 10!

Graduate Recognition Sunday is This Sunday. Be sure to contact Steve Cloud about including your special graduate in the honors!

"Blue Jeans and Bluegrass" is Coming, Sunday May 27. We're encouraging everyone to dress casual on May 27 so you can be ready to help us with the big Move Out! After small-group, we'll provide lunch and then we'll clear out the auditorium so the crews can start the renovation. It's a "Beautiful Thing!"

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Each Wednesday I post my article from "Winning Ways," an e-newsletter that goes out to 1200 subscribers. If you want to subscribe to "Winning Ways," sign up here.

Links to Your World, Tuesday May 15

33 Geeky Insults

 

20 ways to save money.

 

"My kids grew old, so I got a dog. My dog grew old, so I got a skateboard.” From a 47-year-old quoted in a NYT piece on skateboarding as the new midlife crisis.

 

"My Heroes Have Always Been Hebrews." A post by Joe Carter on what is behind evangelicals' love of the Jews.

 

Cathedral Uses PlayStation Game in Worship Service.

 

"Robot Soldiers Will Be A Reality." Didn't these guys see Terminator?

 

"The Talk" that parents should have with their kids now includes what to do about porn. You knew that already, right?

 

Astronauts ask NASA to "cool it" on global warmism.

 

"All there is to say about this, as far as I can see, is that Krauss is dead wrong and his religious and philosophical critics are absolutely right." David Albert, with a PhD in theoretical physics, reviews for the NYT Lawrence Krauss' latest offering to scientism (A Universe From Nothing: Why There is Something Rather Than Nothing). Richard Dawkins, in typical hyperbole, says of Krauss's book, "If ‘On the Origin of Species’ was biology’s deadliest blow to supernaturalism, we may come to see ‘A Universe From Nothing’ as the equivalent from cosmology. The title means exactly what it says. And what it says is devastating." Albert, on the other hand, concludes that what it says is shallow. Krauss responds in this Atlantic interview, showing the kind of intemperance that seems to be required for popularizers of scientism who hope to sell a lot of books. I'm stunned at how clueless he is to his own caustic nature in the interview.

 

Get out your frustrations in the Anger Room, where you're allowed to smash everything in sight.

 

Tweeting Pastor Destroys Wise Reputation

 

Depression in middle age can signal the likelihood of dementia in old age? Great, something else to be depressed about--No, wait...

 

Why The Wild Things Are

Maurice Sendak died yesterday at 83. His classic, "Where The Wild Things Are" has always been a favorite in our house. Barbara Curtis explains "the real scoop" on why the book resonates with so many kids and their parents--

Max misbehaves at dinner and is sent to his room. (Max has parents who care enough to punish him when necessary.)

Max sails away to an island full of Wild Things. (Max cranks up his tantrum—a “wild rumpus” with the Wild Things.)

Max, “King of All the Wild Things,” finally commands them to stop. (He realizes he can take control of his emotions.)

Though the Wild Things beg him to stay, Max sails home again. (He makes the right decision.)

In his room, he finds his warm dinner still waiting. (His parents haven’t stopped loving him.)

 

Anthropologist Discovers Strange Christian Tribe

James Taranto:

Tanya Luhrmann, a Stanford anthropologist, did some field work on an exotic tribe called "evangelical Christians." She explains their mysterious ways to the open-minded, curious readers of the New York Times.

"If you want to understand how evangelicals conceive of their political life, you need to understand how they think about God," she explains. "I saw that when people prayed, they imagined themselves in conversation with God. They do not, of course, think that God is imaginary. . . . They imagine God as wiser and kinder than any human they know."

Fascinating, isn't it? Apparently some of these people live right here in America! In her fieldwork, Luhrmann reports, "I met doctors, scientists and professors at the churches."

And they vote--but they vote differently from the way regular people--oops, make that "secular liberals"--vote: "When secular liberals vote, they think about the outcome of a political choice. . . . When evangelicals vote, they think more immediately about what kind of person they are trying to become--what humans could and should be, rather than who they are."

Uh-oh, that could spell trouble for liberal politicians. But don't worry, Luhrmann has figured it out: "If Democrats want to reach more evangelical voters, they should use a political language that evangelicals can hear." And don't worry: "The good news for secular liberals is that evangelicals are smarter and more varied than many liberals realize."

And hey, we've always found that when we're trying to persuade someone of something, it's always helpful to say: "Wow, you're smarter than I realized!"

Winning Ways: To Forbear is Divine

When giving guidance on life with others, Paul said we should be busy—as the King James puts it— “forbearing one another and forgiving one another” (Colossians 3:13).

Between the two, you’re going to have to forbear a lot more than forgive.

Across my years, I’ve heard a lot of sermons on forgiveness, I’ve read a lot of books on forgiveness, and I’ve been inspired by a lot of dramatic stories about forgiveness—but it’s forbearance that is demanded of us a lot more often. Think about it:

If you forgive your marriage partner for adultery, that may become the subject of a magazine article. But you won’t have to struggle to forgive something like that near as much as you have to forbear your husband’s irritating habit of using the remote to switch between three shows at a time!

Or, if you forgive your father’s murderer, people will want to write a book about you. But you may never be faced with that and yet every day you’re called on to bear up under your roommate’s inability to leave the kitchen as clean as you’d prefer it.

Both forgiveness and forbearance are required of Christians, but it’s forbearance that is called for hundreds of times more often than forgiveness.

How can you increase your capacity for forbearance? You pay attention to four things.

Personality: Some are introverts, others are extroverts. In making decisions, some are rational and others are spontaneous. Not everyone thinks like us, reacts like us, or communicates like us. The more we are sensitive to this, the better we can forbear annoyances.

Perspective: As the old saying goes, “Don’t judge a man until you’ve walked a mile in his shoes.” And, no, that doesn’t mean it’s safe to judge once you’re a mile away and have his shoes! The old proverb advises us to see things as others see them.

Progress: We can be more patient with people if we take into account where they are in their physical and emotional and spiritual progress.

Problems: So much of someone else’s behavior that frustrates us is behavior that springs from the stuff they’re dealing with.

This Sunday @ 10, join us for a deeper study into the power of forgiveness and forbearance. It’s part of our continuing study called “Getting Along.” You can catch up with the series at www.HillcrestAustin.org/sermons. Make Hillcrest part of your Mother’s Day celebration this week!

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Each Wednesday I post my article from "Winning Ways," an e-newsletter that goes out to 1200 subscribers. If you want to subscribe to "Winning Ways," sign up here.

Links to Your World, Tuesday May 8

Woopensocker? Slurt? Jabble? Here are some new words from the newest edition of the Dictionary of American Regional English.

 

Related: Some of the words and phrases we use to describe our behavior on the Internet did not exist just a few years ago. And some of that language is making its way over to the way we describe meatspace.

 

Mona Charen: "What do you suppose are the chances that the Secret Service agents who embarrassed themselves, possibly endangered the life of the president of the United States, and very likely damaged their marriages and the lives of their children by engaging prostitutes in Cartagena were consumers of pornography? I’d guess 100 percent. Not that watching porn completely accounts for the behavior, but pornography undermines sexual restraint. It offers a distorted image of what “everybody” is doing, and it grants permission for indulging every conceivable urge."

 

WSJ: "The most harmful websites in terms of risk from malware infection aren’t, as you might imagine, pornography, but rather religious sites, according to Symantec’s Internet Security Threat Report."


 

Woman's new name is 161 words long.

 

Astonishing artwork with pancake batter. You're going to have to get a lot better to impress the kids on Saturday mornings now.

 

Where are the women apologists? I know several women who have the chops to respond to this challenge.

 

Upgrade your car's engine for 99 cents. Well, at least you can use your stereo system to upgrade your car engine's sound.

 

Kate Murphy, NYT: "You know that dream where you suddenly realize you’re stark naked? You’re living it whenever you open your browser....Your information can be stored, analyzed, indexed and sold as a commodity to data brokers who in turn might sell it to advertisers, employers, health insurers or credit rating agencies....'Companies like Google are creating these enormous databases using your personal information,' said Paul Hill, senior consultant with SystemExperts, a network security company in Sudbury, Mass. 'They may have the best of intentions now, but who knows what they will look like 20 years from now, and by then it will be too late to take it all back.'"

 

 

Review of Tim and Kathy Keller’s book, “The Meaning of Marriage”

“Nothing is as practical as good theory,” goes the old saying.

It’s a good endorsement for Tim and Kathy Keller’s book, The Meaning of Marriage. While there are many practical books on marriage, the Kellers lay out the “theory” behind marriage—to practical effect. In other words, they explain the biblical principles behind the Christian concept of marriage, providing a good foundation for the practices that make marriage work.

As a pastor of a successful church in Manhattan, Tim Keller is a good model to those of us who try to communicate a biblical worldview to a secular audience, or an audience heavily impacted by secularism. His New York Times bestseller, The Reason for God, is helpful for addressing some of the “defeater beliefs” that keep people from seriously considering Christianity. In a way, The Meaning of Marriage is helpful for addressing some of the “defeater beliefs” that keep people from considering the Christian view of marriage, gender roles, and sex.

I particularly found it useful to read Tim Keller’s reminder that marriage is a disciple-making tool where we mutually learn how to become the people God intended us to be in Christ. In that way, marriage is a safe setting in which partners can give and receive truth wrapped love. Kathy Keller’s courageous explanation of biblical headship and submission will be helpful to many couples as well.

There are a few glaring typos (pages 108, 219, and 229), which are annoying after shelling out what you have to pay for hardbound books these days. But we won’t put that blame at the feet of the Kellers. Anyone wanting a richer Christian marriage, and anyone wanting to more effectively communicate the Christian convictions about marriage, should get a copy of this book.

“Isn’t Christianity Weird?”

I sat in a pew on a Sunday afternoon recently, awaiting the start of my sons' piano recital. Their teacher had rented a church for the occasion, and the families of her pupils - some of whom had apparently not been in a church for some time, if ever - were staring at the images all around them. As a father and daughter behind me began to remark on the pictures they saw, I was struck again by this basic principle of Christianity's strangeness.

"Isn't Christianity weird?" the teenager said to her father in a stage whisper. "I mean, all these pictures of a dead guy on a cross. All this blood and suffering and stuff."

"Yeah," her father replied with a nervous chuckle. "It's gross, isn't it? I don't get it."

Figuring out why this man and his daughter don't get it is the task of the listening Christian friend.

Humble Apologetics, John Stackhouse Jr., pp. 163-164

Review of Sheila Walsh’s “God Loves Broken People”

Hey! Diane has a review of Sheila Walsh’s book, God Loves Broken People. This “guest blogger” thing could catch on!

In the book "God Loves Broken People", Sheila Walsh explores just what it means to feel "broken" in today's world.  She shares stories and examples of the many ways people feel damaged and therefore less useful to God.  Sheila also shares how to allow these circumstances to let ourselves grow closer to God, rather than more distant.  The book is deeply personal and easily relatable.  It offers help for those who feel wounded and would like to know how the Bible addresses this issue.   It includes a Bible study guide for more in-depth coverage for individuals or small groups.  I would recommend it for any who are hurting and looking for perspective.

Review of Ross Douthat's "Bad Religion"

It's fitting that the release of Ross Douthat's new book happened to coincide with the death of Charles Colson, because reading "Bad Religion" reminded me so much of Colson's critiques of culture and of the church.

With the waning of Christian influence in American culture since the 1960s, Douthat claims the vacuum has been filled not with "no religion" but with "bad religion." In other words, though conservative Christians fear--and militant atheists proclaim--the eventual triumph of secularism, what we're seeing instead is "the rise of a variety of destructive pseudo-Christianities" where "traditional Christian teachings have been warped into justifications for solipsism and anti-intellectualism, jingoism and utopianism, selfishness and greed."

The book begins with a review of American Christianity immediately following World War 2, "an era of intellectual confidence, artistic vitality, pews full to bursting, and a widespread sense that traditional Christian faith and contemporary liberal democracy were natural partners." Though he will later close the book with a caution that "true golden ages do not exist," in this first part of the book he makes a pretty good case as to why the 40s and 50s came close. Regardless, Douthat continues in the first part of his book to chronicle how American Christianity quickly lost its influence on the American culture.

The second half of the book describes the "bad religion" that has resulted. He describes the fascination with supposed "lost" Christianities in which people hope to find a Jesus more to their liking. He exposes the winsome version of "name-it-and-claim-it" theology espoused behind the toothy grin of Joel Osteen. He explores the popularity of the "God Within" beliefs of Elizabeth Gilbert and Oprah Winfrey. Finally, he turns his attention on Glen Beck and others who co-opt Christian language and loyalties for the cause of nationalism.

Though expressing pessimism about a recovery, he concludes the book with a few suggestions on how a robust and faithful Christianity might return.

Cross-cultural missionaries are careful students of the social environment they enter. Faithful American Christians who recognize that they are "on mission" within their own country will read "Bad Religion" to better understand the culture in which we serve. It may also serve as a critique of some of the ways our own churches (and we ourselves) have drifted into "bad religion."

As I said, in volumes on my bookshelf from 20 years ago, Charles Colson criticized each of the four failings Douthat highlights. It's good to know that, upon the week of Colson's passing, that mantle has been passed to another worthy observer.

 

Winning Ways: When You Have to be a Mediator

If you’re expecting a boy and looking for a good name, how about Syzygus?

No, I didn’t think so.

Still, it’s a perfectly good name. It’s Greek for “partner,” and for the good of the gospel it needs to be our nature even if it’s not our name.

Paul once addressed two battling believers by name: “I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord” (Philippians 4:2). And then in the third verse he turned to a third person and said, “Help these two women make peace.” Various Bible translations will either refer to this third party by an honored title (“partner”) or by a proper name (“Syzygus”).

Sometimes we’re in a quarrel like the one between Euodia and Syntyche. Sometimes we see a quarrel as Syzygus did. Either way, we have a role to play.

Sometimes we’re in a quarrel, as Euodia and Syntyche were. Ironically enough, neither one lived up to their names. Do you know what “Euodia” means? “Eu” means “good” and “odia” is where we get the word “odor.” So, “Euodia” means fragrant…aromatic…sweet-smelling. But Euodia was raising one holy stink in the church at Philippi! And while “Syntyche” is the Greek word for “fortunate,” I don’t imagine the Philippian church felt very lucky to have Syntyche disrupting things!

Isn’t it sad that the only thing we know about Euodia and Syntyche is what we read in the fourth chapter of Philippians? Wouldn’t it be sad if the only memory people had of you was some controversy you stirred up, or some difference you refused to mend, or some decision of the church you just couldn’t put behind you. Let’s make a commitment to be remembered for far better things.

But Paul doesn’t stop there. He turns to a third party and says, “Help these women make their peace.” When we see conflict between others, we tend to just shake our head in dismay and otherwise ignore the problem. But you prove you are a “true partner” in building Christian community when you help to bring peace between battling believers.

As we continue our series called “Getting Along,” this Sunday we’ll look at how to mediate a conflict. “Syzygus” needs to be our nature even if it’s not our name! Join us @ 10 a.m.!

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Each Wednesday I post my article from "Winning Ways," an e-newsletter that goes out to 1200 subscribers. If you want to subscribe to "Winning Ways," sign up here.

Links to Your World, Tuesday May 1

"Chilled" by creepy people isn't just a metaphor, according to a study.

 

The Secularization of Dr Martin Luther King, Jr.

 

Reportedly boasting one of the world's highest IQs and unapologetically admitting a 3-hour a day addiction to online porn, Rick Rosner is either a very clever publicity hound or a sad illustration that intelligence and wisdom are two separate things.

 

Robert P. Jones of WaPo suggests that Millennials may be disconnecting from the Christian churches of their childhood because they perceive churches as "anti-gay." But take a look at the chart in his article and you'll see hardly a dip among evangelical Millennials and a precipitious drop in churches anachronistically called "Mainline." Yet evangelicals are unsupportive of homosexuality when asked by reporters (which is usually the only time an evangelical leader actually talks about the issue) while Mainline churches have endorsed and celebrated gay unions and gay ordinations.

 

Thanks, anti-vaccination nuts, for the return of measles.

 

"There are probably five Bibles on every shelf in American homes. Americans buy the Bibles, they debate the Bible, they love the Bible... they just don't read the Bible" (Lamar Vest, president and CEO of the American Bible Society)

 

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